Recently, while cleaning out my closet, I decided it was time to stop wearing the old frocks from my collection and shop for some new workout clothes to exercise and sweat in – and that included buying a few new sports bras as well. It’s not like I hadn’t shopped for bras before; I had done it numerous times in the past. How long could it possibly take to find the right sports bra?! And so the hunt was on….and what a hunt it turned out to be!
Since having my defibrillator put in, bra shopping had become an even bigger pain – literally. With it located under my collar bone and tucked in just above my left breast, finding a comfortable bra had become a huge challenge. It never failed; some straps rubbed the scar the wrong way, lace made it itch. In most cases, just moving the breast muscle around too much or having it push the defibrillator up against my skin would cause some serious discomfort.
One store, two stores, three stores, and more!! Exhaustion soon set in and frustration would ensue. It’s no wonder husbands or significant others tend not to enjoy the “thrill” of bra shopping with the ones they love. Amazing how difficult finding the best fitting sports bra was turning out to be. Far too many to choose from! You’ve got one’s with thin straps, ones with thick straps, one’s with fancy decorations, one’s without; under-wire, no wire, extra padding, no padding, push up, or flatten out – the choices seemed endless. Not to mention the rainbow of colors and variety of patterns each style of bra came in. Whatever happened to only having a few items to choose from? I so longed for those days when you didn’t have an overwhelming array to choose from.
Try on, take off. Try on, take off……the cycle continued on for what seemed like an eternity. Twisting and contorting my arms to fasten the clasps in back. Others were yanked and pulled and done up in front. It didn’t take long for anxiety to creep up and the desire to yank the defibrillator from my chest to set in. I was beginning to remember how much I disliked these sorts of shopping trips. Flashbacks of past bra shopping experiences reminded me of all the times I had spent in stores, hunting and searching for the perfect one and how much discomfort I would be in after trying on so many.
Hours passed and I was at my wits end with no potential keepers in sight. I was tired, sore, and not to mention, feeling a bit discouraged. I was annoyed that I had this foreign object in my chest, making an already irritating shopping trip even worse. Ready to give up and walk out of the store, something caught my eye. Could it be? Did I just find the perfect bra? I decided to give the fitting room one last chance. In I went, closing the door behind me and feeling a bit of hope begin to brighten my day. I tried it on and it fit! Perfectly!! What a relief!!! I ran back to the rack and found a few more in my size. A smile began to stretch from ear to ear.
The anxiety quickly subsided as I walked to the register to pay for my purchases. Waiting in line, I reminded myself that as painful and irritating of an experience bra shopping turned out to be, this defibrillator that I wanted so much to rip out of my chest had a purpose and was implanted to save my life. Enduring some temporary discomfort was far better than the alternative of not being here at all. As Lance Armstrong said, Pain is temporary to which I reply, feeling some pain is better than feeling no pain at all.